Thank you everyone for all the thoughts, prayers, emails, calls, texts, cards, flowers and food. I can not express to you what each of these have meant to me over the past week. I apologize to pretty much all of you for not having called, texted or written you back yet. I have only talked to about 10 people this week, and I will get to talking to more soon, but I just haven't had the energy to talk about what all happened 600 times over. Please forgive me, but each of your condolences has truly meant something to me.
I'm doing okay. It was a very overwhelming week. When I got the call Monday morning, I had to leave an hour later to go to Starkville, Mississippi of all places. Unfortunately, I had a tuxedo fitting for the KA fraternity on the books for a month and a half and could not reschedule. I had to be in Stark-vegas Monday and Tuesday. I couldn't find anyone who was able to go overnight with me, so I brought my most available best friend, who doesn't work and is the best consoler, Ajax! So I can say one good thing about Starkville, they have pet friendly hotels. Ha! Anyhow, her sweet soul came with me and we cuddled, cried and ate. I got back Tuesday evening. my Aunt from Germantown came down Wednesday for the day to be with me. We had a really nice day. Went to Lenoras, went to Taylor. Had a lovely day and some more good consoling.
Thursday I went back to work, and that was a mistake. I just felt very overwhelmed, anxious and overall unproductive. But unfortunately, this is a very busy time of year for me, and I really can't afford to miss days, especially knowing that I'll be taking off to go to Florida next week.
That's been probably the biggest question most of you have, "when is the funeral?" There is no funeral. My dad's wishes were to be cremated and spread his ashes at 3 places; 2 place in Florida and 1 in upstate New york, Lake George where we always spend every summer camping for 2 weeks.
Liz and I are in need of some closure. I guess this is the weird part about not having a "service" because there isn't an "ending" to this death chapter. So I have booked a flight home next Friday for a week, to be with Liz and we will spread part of his ashes while I am there in Florida. He wants some in the ocean, and some a local watering hole, "Maulhauffer's". Where he had his 60th birthday in September. I think this will help Liz and I with much needed closure. I am really in a state of disbelief right now. I know he's gone, but because there hasn't been a service, it doesn't feel real.
I do believe dad made it to heaven and he is with his mom and dad. His mom passed away 48 years ago and I'm sure its been a really nice homecoming for him. He was on 12 when she passed. Thats a long time to have lived without her and I am so happy that he's with her again.
Here are some photos of dad in his year battle with throat cancer. If you need more reason to quit smoking (and drinking) here's at it:
This was Thankgiving 2008 in Oxford for my wedding. This was Thanksgiving night we had a bonfire. Our last family photo.
Dad and I about to walk down the aisle November 2008
This was Dad and I Feb 2009 when I was down in Florida. Before he was diagnosed. His throat was hurting for about 2 weeks, I remember him saying.
Dad and his doctor at Moffitt Cancer center. He thought the world of this man.
Liz Dad introduced dad to Tijuana Flats here in August 2009. He loved their hot sauces.
Dad and mom at Mahauffer's for Dad's 60th in September 2009. This Cadillac is street legal and picked him up for this celebration
Dad and Liz inside Mauhauffer's
This was my trip down to Florida in late October 2009. This was dad's last day of chemo and radiation.
We took the pontoon boat out while I was down there. Dad was so happy but I remember he was SO sick that day.
March 2010 at this Hospice facility we had moved to after his Trach
Dad and my cousin Barbie March 2010
dad's last stint March 10th, 2010- He went on a buying spree with his best friend from High School. They went to buy Baby Barron his first BB gun.
Dad test firing the BB gun for Barron 2 weeks ago.
I am amazed at his smile he kept, through all the pain and demise of this disease. He fought to live and leave a legacy until the very end. Raise your glasses friends, to a man who knew to smile and live life happily despite any circumstances in life.
Best,
Kate
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